The Chutney Grind

January 7, 2008

A big thank you to all of you who attended the Chutney Saturday dinner this past Saturday at the Bua Thai restaurant, followed by clubbing at Black Cat. Here's the customary after-dinner essay for those of you who missed the event and for those of you who didn't.

We had an unprecedented high turnout of 45 people for the dinner, which is head and shoulders and chest above the previous high of 26 last August, and 17 last month. A turnout of 15 was considered a big success until just a few months ago. We would have had 55 people, but 10 who had initially RSVPed subsequently canceled.

Diversity Shines

The crowd was delightfully diverse. There were a dozen women, a number of non-South Asians, a couple of folks from the Asian Queer group AQUA, a number of first-timers, a number of long-lost Khushies, a number of visitors from Baltimore and beyond, and also a cute couple visiting from small-town Indianapolis. The age diversity was also striking. The youngest attendees were 7 and 9, and the oldest were as old as hillocks. I wouldn't say they were as old as the hills, as that phrase refers to the very old. I almost forgot to mention. There were much more than many men too.

There were folks who grew up in India, Pakistan, Sri Lanka and Bangladesh, as well as many who grew up here in the U.S. or in Africa or elsewhere. This was a welcome contrast to a few years ago, when KhushDC event attendees were almost exclusively Indian-born and India-raised.

Luminaries Glow

There was no dearth of luminaries. Atul and Yassir, KhushDC's two co-founders were present, as was Wen Chen, a co-founder of AQUA. Two former Presidents also graced the occasion: Bill Clinton and Jimmy Carter. Ooops, I mean Paresh and Amrita, two former KhushDC Presidents. Christopher Dyer who is the ANC Commissioner, Director of the Office of LGBT Affairs and a distinguished member of Washington DC Mayor Fenty's cabinet also joined us for dinner.

I could tell from the glow that the other attendees exuded that they too were luminaries in their own way. But there were too many of them and I was too caught up with counting the check money to get a chance to natter or hobnob with the other nabobs.

KhushDC has always had diverse members and a luminary or two always attends any Khush event. But it's rare to have so much diversity and so many luminaries converging to any single event.

Humor Lightens

We would have chatted with our neighbors at the table and eaten our food and thought we had a good time. But we had an even better time, thanks to Paresh. He created the glue that bonded us together as a group and gave us an opportunity to laugh at each other. Paresh suggested that we introduce ourselves to each other and also tell everyone what we would do if our house were to start burning down.

The responses were varied. Some folks said they would save their cats or their dogs and their partner, though not necessarily in that order. Jimmy Carter said she would hold herself responsible if her house started burning, for only she could have set it afire. A couple of people said they would save their passports; others said they would save their family pictures.

I thought of saying that I'd immediately go out and start looking for a rental apartment. But I had second thoughts. "It's best not to reveal secrets", I figured.
So I said something else. "I shall save the fire-extinguisher from the house", I revealed.
No one laughed.
I sat back down.
Humor delights when it succeeds. It embarrasses when it falls flat.

Food Fills

A number of people reached the venue well before 8.00 p.m., and most attendees were in place by 8.15. Yet it was 8.40 or so by the time we ordered our food. It came as a pleasant surprise when the food arrived almost instantly thereafter.

The vegetarian dish that I ordered tasted great. But its amount was so paltry that it amounted to having a snack rather than a meal. I've had a similar experience at some Thai restaurants in the past. I didn't come across anyone else bitching about their food, so I reckon folks enjoyed theirs.

Wallets Bleed

The total bill came to $632, inclusive of the 10% tax and an 18% tip. So the food + drinks tab was $494. We collected $658, which is $26 more than the total. We had been seated at three tables, and I learned that the 20 or so people seated at the long table nearest the window had collectively paid $40 more, mainly because there was not enough change.

We had enough in $1 bills by the time we collected money from all three tables, and I thought of returning the excess money to those from table # 3 who had overpaid. But most of the people from that table had left their table, and a chorus of voices told me that I should give the excess money to the restaurant as a tip. So that's what we did. By factoring in the excess $26, we ended up paying a 23% tip, rather than an 18% tip.

Drama Delights

No LGBT event is complete without its fair share of drama. You already know how Thai Tanic stood us up on Saturday afternoon, forcing a last-minute change to Bua Thai. Even before Jahangir went to Thai Tanic to talk to them, their promises sounded fishy to me, so I called Divya - the KhushDC President - and suggested that we ready a Plan B.

Divya said she would check with nearby restaurants and call me back in ten minutes. But she did not call back in ten minutes; she called back just in five. She had checked with three other nearby restaurants - including an Ethiopian restaurant across the street from Thai Tanic - and found that they were either too small to seat us all or they could not arrange the seating at such short notice.

Luckily, Bua Thai was a welcome exception. It was ready to seat 40 people in a separate upstairs room at short notice, and it was just three blocks away from Thai Tanic. Most importantly, it too was a Thai restaurant. I am sure some folks who had RSVPed would have canceled their plans if we had made a last-minute switch from Thai to another cuisine.

"So should I go ahead and reserve Bua Thai?", Divya asked.
I was hesitant. "I'm not sure if we have the phone numbers of all 35 RSVPs", I said. "Besides, let's see what Jahangir has to say about Thai Tanic."
Jahangir called a few minutes later from Thai Tanic. I was hoping against hope that we could continue with Thai Tanic. But those hopes were dashed.
"We have a plan B", I told Jahangir. Jahangir then admonished Thai Tanic and told them to re-direct any Khush attendees to Bua Thai.

We now had no choice but to switch to Bua Thai, whether or not we had everyone's phone numbers. Divya offered to stand outside Thai Tanic for 45 minutes until 8.30 pm to re-direct those who hadn't got the message: those who we could not contact or those who we didn't know were coming since they had not RSVPed. Divya, Jahangir and I then divvied up the list of RSVPs and decided which of us would call whom.

I know for a fact that Divya re-directed at least one person when she waited outside Thai Tanic that evening. I am sure she must have done more than one re-direction.

Future Beckons

Given the large number of folks who attended the Chutney Saturday dinner, it's a good bet that future Chutneys will have a similarly high - and maybe even higher - attendance. Rehan, Paresh and a number of others have suggested that we do a dinner buffet next time. That will simplify the accounting, accommodate a larger crowd, present us with a wider variety of food at a fixed price, and most importantly of all, give us the time and the breathing space to mingle more extensively with each other.

So we will aim to organize a dinner buffet next month onwards. We haven't organized one before, so we welcome all suggestions. Do you know which restaurants are open to arranging dinner buffets on Saturday evenings? The closer to Dupont the better it will be. The place should be big enough to seat 50 people.

Thank Yous Rock

I would like to extend a special Thank You to those of the attendees who took extra efforts to attend the event. S, who came to the event with two small kids, and X, who drove from a town 50 miles away, but couldn't stay for dinner as he/she had to return home early that night, and to many others.

Thanks Harish, Jahangir and Divya for your assistance with the event setup, the money collection for the dinner check and for the membership drive.

Many - probably most - of the dinner attendees then headed to Black Cat for DJ Rekha's Bhangra Blowout. I was so blown out from the day's bhangra that I headed to Java House with a few folks for dessert and then headed home. It feels good when your home isn't burning...

See you at a future KhushDC event!

--Ninad
KhushDC Board